You wanna pet this guy?

You are all for animal rights, right? And you are probably all for a sustainable welfare state for humans, right? Now would you agree to putting the two together to create, well, an Animal Welfare State?

What is an Animal Welfare State, you ask? It's quite simple really. Any one who decides to own a pet instantly puts an obligation on you the taxpayer to subsidise its medical care. Your neighbour's small crocodile needs dental work? You pay for it. Someone's chihuahua is psychologically disturbed because it wants to be a labrador? You, the taxpayer, foot its behavioural therapy bill.

Far fetched? Think again. The Partit Laburista seems to be moving in this direction.

Last time I checked, Toni Abela the party's deputy leader was the registered editor of the party paper KulHadd. A couple of days ago he published a story signed by 'Invictus' criticising the new animal hospital in ta' Qali for charging its clients for its services. Shocked and horrified, 'Invictus' tells us that the animal kingdom hospital even has the audacity of charging VAT on top. (Significantly, the story omits a crucial fact: that the services to injured stray animals are free.)

KulHadd is a party paper run by the party's deputy leader. And don't tell me that this story is not an inside job. So effectively, Toni Abela is promoting the stand that animal health care services should be fully subsidised, that he and his party stand for the creation of the first an Animal Welfare State.

I imagine that animal owners will be climbing over each other for a chance to lovingly pet Toni Abela. I don't blame them. It looks like under Labour they will no longer have to pay for their pet's medical bills. You and I will.

It is difficult to understand what makes Labour policy-making tick or even how it comes about. The party leader declares that until election time Labour policies on bread and butter issues will be, as we say, Fatima's secret. Then off goes Toni Abela and pulls this, well, rabbit out of a hat.

Here's a thought to provide some perspective. For years, Labour has refused to take a position on pension reform, probably the biggest financial challenge this country will face in the near future. Pensions are the welfare state's cornerstone and, in turn, the welfare state is historically the cornerstone of the Partit Laburista.

Yet today's Labour remains hermetically sealed to any debate on the matter. Not even the Sant to Muscat leadership change was sufficient impetus for the party to rise to this fundamental political occasion. But lo and behold, the deputy leader is leading the way in the creation of the world's first Animal Welfare State. Animal crackers, if you ask me.